How do we get our children to do what needs to be done?

How do we actually get our children to do what needs to be done? It is a tough one and it is something we talk about a lot in my one on one coaching sessions.  The truth is, it is a tricky one and we often need to explore what motivates your child specifically.

 Here are some tips to help motivate your child:

1. One step simple instructions.  Please do not interrupt that task with further instructions, as it will distract them.
   
   
2. Be visual have a chart or draw out what they need to do.  Have the action of moving the paperclip down the side of the paper or ticking the task off, so that the child gets the sense of satisfaction and completing something.
   
   
3. Be consistent.  They need to do the same things each day to develop muscle memory.  If they do, their brain does it automatically. A structured predictable environment is best.
   
   
4. Nothing happens unless you decide it does.  Decide that they are going to do it, don’t flake out or do it yourself.  We often fail because we get bored or discouraged and just as our child is about to make the behaviour a habit, we stop enforcing it.  If we don't back up our request, they can learn that they don’t have to take us seriously. You can offer to do the task with the child.
   
   
5. Praise.  Remember to praise them when they complete a task.  High fives, big gestures, big smiles.
   
   
6. Timers - I like the sand timers - visual representation of time.
   
   
7. Mystery prize box. Remember instant gratification/reward. For older children you can wrap up experience vouchers like ‘10 mins of ipad’ etc

I hope this helps you.  If you struggle with this issue and need assistance please have a look at coaching or the ADHD and Families Program.